Kingfisher Cove

We Need to Do What We Can

I strongly encourage you to go here and add yourself to the emergency petition to let it be known that you oppose the nomination of Samuel Alito to the Supreme Court.

My main horror when Bush was re-elected was that it would come to this -- his stacking the Supreme Court with neocons.  And here we are.   Need some reasons?

Basic Rights for Working Families
As a judge on the Appeals Court, Alito issued a ruling to gut the Family and Medical Leave Act, which guarantees most workers up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave to care for a loved one in an emergency. The Supreme Court effectively overturned that ruling in 2003—but if Alito were on the Supreme Court he would pose a grave threat to the basic rights of working families.

Civil Rights (in the workplace and beyond)
In separate cases, Alito wrote dissenting opinions that would have made it essentially impossible to prove employment discrimination based on race or disability. He was overruled and harshly criticized by his colleagues, but if he were on the Supreme Court he could turn back the clock on decades of progress in securing civil rights for minorities and the disabled.

A Woman's Right to Choose
Alito's judicial record and published views make him widely regarded as a sure vote to overturn Roe v. Wade. The extremist anti-abortion group Operation Rescue (who opposed Harriet Miers) responded to Alito's nomination today by saying: "Roe's days are numbered...We are trusting that we are now on the fast-track to derailing Roe v. Wade as the law of the land." If Alito were on the Supreme Court, reproductive freedom would be in serious jeopardy.

Privacy and Civil Liberties
In one significant case, Alito wrote a dissenting oppinion that would have allowed an unauthorized strip search of a woman and her 10 year-old daughter, in their own home, without a warrant. Again, Alito was outvoted and strongly criticized by his fellow judges, but if he were to join Thomas and Scalia on the Supreme Court he would pose a grave threat to civil liberties and individual freedoms.

We need to make it clear that the fanatical religious right will not steamroll those of us with common sense.   

Mellow

Saturday Night at Harstine - We set our clocks back tonight and so I’m taking full advantage.  A whole extra hour this weekend, how cool is that? ‘Course, the downside is that it’ll be dark so damned early now. At the peak of this season, it’ll be full-on dark at 4:30, and when I leave work to head home, it’ll feel like it may as well be midnight. (I think I’ve mentioned before that my least favorite month is November, for this very reason).

As a kid, I enjoyed this time of year. I remember eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and seeing my reflection in the window with the pitch dark beyond. (We had sandwiches at night if we’d had hot lunch at school that day. Dad worked swing shift – same as JDub now. I only saw my dad on weekends, same as JDub now…) As an adult, I’ve never enjoyed this time of year. Heading to work in the dark, heading home in the dark. It just doesn’t feel the same as it did as when I was a kid. But I also know that if I don’t dwell too much on it and abide my time, and get uber-busy during the holiday season (and use my S.A.D. light therapy, which I do every morning), before I know it the days will start getting longer again.

It’s just wonderful to be here at Harstine, and we lucked out with the weather today. After getting up pretty early to meet with our architect (for him to see the site and start the process of determining what we can and can’t do regarding building our eventual retirement house), I took an early nap and woke up to sunshine. So I immediately headed on down to the beach with the weenie dogs and I found 7 agates in a very short period of time. Then tonight after dinner we had a fire on the deck and again we felt so fortunate – even saw a few stars! We also heard the coyotes across the way on Squaxin Island. How fitting for it being so close to Halloween! There is something about hearing them that is so exciting and unique. Part of it is knowing that we’re safe and the weenie dogs are safe, since they're across the water on the uninhabited island. But it’s the wildness of it all that intrigues us. In this day and age with so many people everywhere, and traffic everywhere, and the hustle and bustle of human life (everywhere), it’s just unique to be here and listen to the wild. And nothing else.

I’ve been spending quite a lot of time last night and tonight working on my Christmas newsletter, using InDesign. (I LOVE that program!) I believe I’m close to being done. I need to see how it looks in print before I decide if it’s good to go. Plus, allow a little more time to pass before printing off multiple cNates in case there’s more to add to it. I need to be flexible! But, at least on-screen I’m happy with the design.

Sunday Night at Home - Well, the weather definitely sucked today.   It's been wet and gray and dreary all day long.  We just hung out in the camping trailer, napped, read, played on the computer, did jigsaw puzzles.  It was funny.  We'd been to Costo a week ago or so, and JDub pointed out this hardcover book in the bestseller stacks that obviously caught his attention, but also intrigued me as well, so I bought it.  It's called "The Highest Tide" and it's written by a local guy (Jim Lynch) who lives in Olympia and is a journalist for the Olympian newspaper.  This was his first novel, and it took place all along the South Puget Sound around the vicinity of Harstine and the neighboring islands and the Olympia tideflats -- where JDub grew up.  The story was from the point of view of a 13-year-old boy who lives on the beach, and I'd been reading it during lunch this past week and have found it to be delightful.  I was telling JDub how good it was, and this morning when I got up (after sleeping in pretty late), here he was reading the book!  (I swear, he hasn't read fiction since I first met him -- actually thought he'd given it up).   He continued to read it throughout the morning and was absolutely hooked and absorbed -- and loving it.  So I laid down for a nap, while he continued to read.  When I woke up, he was napping, so I grabbed the book and finished it before he could get his paws back on it!   He then worked on his jigsaw puzzle while I read the last pages, and immediately after I closed it up, he grabbed it and finished it himself!  It was really good.  We both just loved it, and were blown away at how well written it was.  I don't know if it was at our Costco because it was a local author, or if it's available everywhere.  I sure do recommend it!  It was...magical.

So, mellow was the day.  We left about 6:00 and it was the darkest dark!  It's just pouring and nasty out now -- it's good to be off the roads.  Yucky drive.

I hadn't heard from my dad over the weekend about my mom's condition, so I called my brother tonight to see if he'd heard anything.  Mom is still in the hospital, and they apparently did an MRI and discovered a spot on her spine that the doctors believe indicates an infection.  So they took a sample of spinal fluid and will test it to determine what's going on -- we should know more tomorrow.  My brother talked to Mom and he said she sounded loopy and painfree (meaning that she was drugged to the gills).  At least they've found something that helps with the pain.  (It's gotta be morphine, I'd think).  A spinal infection?  Hmm.  What does that mean?  My brother did some research on the internet and he said it typically requires pretty invasive surgery.  (I was thinking -- oh, throw some antibiotics at it and call it good, but it's apparently not that simple). 

So, tomorrow begins another week of not seeing my husband.  Sigh.

Well...

My mom's in the hospital again.  She and Dad were supposed to leave for their six-month stint in Yuma, AZ this morning, but Mom's pain was so over-the-top early yesterday morning, that Dad took her to the emergency room.  Her pain has been escalating in the last couple of weeks to the point of being totally unbearable.  Even 80 mg. of Oxycontin wasn't touching it.  (And that prescription cost over $500).  In the emergency room, shots did nothing.  IV drips of pain meds did nothing.  She was finally given a strong sedative and she conked out for three hours.  I talked to my dad last night and he said they were going to try out a morphine patch, and keep her overnight.  The intensity of this pain has me worried.  It's pain that has moved over time, from the left side to the right side, to the shoulders, then back to a side again.  It could be what they call "referred pain", which originates one place and radiates to others, but why can't they pinpoint it?  Why can't they do something about it?  What, exactly is causing it?  And if it's not her back (from the MRIs and stuff, they just can't see why she's having this excruciating pain) -- what else should they be looking for?  We might not want to know the answer to that question.

JDub's getting home early tonight (the only time we have spent together this week is to kiss each other goodnight and to kiss each other goodbye) and we're heading down (in the dark) to Harstine.  We have a meeting with the architect tomorrow morning.  It'll be so nice to get out of Dodge, even if the weather is supposed to be icky.  Looks like it could even be stormy.  I need to get stuff ready to head out as soon as he gets home, which should be soon. 

Hump Day

Today was a welcome day away from the office, taking a Word class at a nearby community college’s branch campus. (Uhm, yes, to brush up on those highly-regarded word processing skills….). To be honest, I’ve needed to take a Word class for a long time, but I’ve been rather stubborn about it because I just did not want to be labeled as a word processor, and it seems that knowing Word makes you one. I’ve been able to get around in it (sort of), but it’s true I’m not all that functional, particularly with the higher end stuff. But to be more well-rounded, I decided to have a better attitude about it. Knowledge of anything never hurt anyone.

There were only seven of us in the class. We went around and introduced ourselves and explained where we worked and what we wanted to get out of the class. Two women sitting across the aisle from me introduced themselves as working for Da Airplane Company, and when they gave their names, I just knew who they had to be. JDub has mentioned P and L basically daily for the last four years, since he’s been working at the North Field site. He has the utmost respect for them. He’s worked especially close with P, as she’s the wiz-bang with the Company’s immense, bottomless database, which she knows inside out and upside down. She has saved his butt on many occasions. So during a break I asked L, “You work at North Field?” Yup, she did. I asked, “Do you know JDub?” “Oh, God yes, he’s this amazing guy, such a hard worker, just took on a temporary management job on second shift, wish I could eat as much as he does and stay so thin.” Then she looked at me curiously, and I explained, “He’s my husband.” “OHMYGOD, I’ve got to tell P! Oh, he’s the greatest guy!” (And on and on and on). It was fun! I told them both how high on a pedestal JDub views them, as well. I even snuck an email to JDub via Yahoo during class and said, “You’ll never guess who’s in this class with me – P and L! I kid you not!” Later I checked to see if he’d replied and he was all, “Oh, God, now you’ll hear all the skinny about me.” But he was pretty tickled by it – three of his favorite girls all together. Heh heh.

The class was really quite good for me. There were aspects of frustration – the instructor was a bit loopy at times. I’d had her previously for an Access class and felt the same way, because she’d easily veer off track. In this case I was able to stay with her while she did her veering. Access was another story. HOWEVER. There were people in this Word class who were utterly lost. Two women in there hardly had any understanding of Windows at all, and people ought to be strongly encouraged to get Windows down before they venture into these programs. (They offer Windows classes, I’m sure – it’s the backbone of everything). One woman had never even used a MOUSE before! Lord! I really felt sorry for them, because they were so frustrated. One even broke down into tears at one point. But it was also frustrating for the rest of us because of all the time demanded on the instructor to catch them up, show them basic Windows things (“click the small X to minimize your document”), and explain over and over again how to do something. It was an intermediate class, and supposedly they had both taken the beginning class just last week. But they obviously forgot everything they were taught, and certainly didn’t practice in between. For people who are so green, they really should take an all-encompassing class that stretches over a few weeks. Hard to do when you work, though. I was pretty proud of myself about grasping everything easily. Now I just need to practice!

OK, I went on about that way too long.

How about this for an amazing quote:

“Does anyone doubt that the continued prosecution of this war [in Iraq] has to do with the personality of the commander in chief, a man who is stubborn and calls it strength, who wears blinders and calls it vision?”

Wow. What a great column by Anna Quindlen. Go here to read it in its entirety – it’s superb.

Sights Set on Friday!

It's certainly s-l-o-w  in Typepadville.   Jeeze!  I haven't even been able to access it for over two hours.  And now that I finally have, it's still acting sluggish and weird.  It's not that I even have anything dire or interesting to blog about, but I hate not having the option!   OK, then, I'll shake off all that residual panic.  (And save often).

JDub is totally underway in his new job.  And I'm totally underway in adapting to not having him around in the evenings.  Last night at 11:30 p.m., which is definitely past my bedtime, I happened to still be up chatting with Nate when JDub got home.  We did some hurry-up-and-catch-up, and then went to bed.  This morning, JDub woke up in time for me to kiss him goodbye.  I don't think I can (or should) wait up until 11:30 tonight -- it's going to get to me sooner or later not having enough sleep.  But it's a drag.  We're good buddies and, well, this sucks.

Yes, there are some up-sides.  Not cooking dinner is Numero Uno.  It's Lean Cuisines for me, baby.  At my thinnest when I was a single mom, all I did in the evenings was cook Nate kid food (mac & cheese, chicken nuggets, grilled cheese sandwiches), and if I ate at all, it was something Really Light.  (Lean Cuisines were around then, too, and they're yummy).  Also?  The weenie dogs -- when they aren't rushing to the door because they think they've heard the Durango's headers -- are MY BUDS.  They adore me!  (Instead of adoring JDub, who is most definitely the Alpha in this household, although the Beta must be good enough when he's away).  They're even more cuddlier with Nate than they've ever been.  (I don't know what he would be -- their litter-mate?  They all share the same color of hair, that's for sure). 

So JDub is planning/hoping to take off early Friday so we can head to Harstine.  We didn't go this past weekend (Saturday we pouted about that because it was a beautiful day, but Sunday pretty much sucked).  This weekend may well suck, too.  Have to count on that this time of year.  But... we are meeting with our Architect Saturday morning there at our property.  We're going forward with having him advocate for us with the County to get a lock on where we can build, if we can possibly get a waiver for building a little closer to the water than code allows (based on environmental mitigation), and assess the feasibility of spanning the gully to build our house.  The actual building is down the road -- several years away.  But if there's something we can do to lock it in, such as building a garage, or maybe all or part of the foundation, it'll give us a shorter-term goal that should be possible to achieve.  We just need to know what we ultimately CAN DO, so we can make some decisions for our future.  JDub will likely design the house itself (with my input of course), and then have the Architect tweak, adjust for structural integrity, and address the detailing.  In the meantime, we continue to work and SAVE.  (And dream of retirement...)  That reminds me.  I really need to buy a lottery ticket.

I hoped to see changes at work on the part of our micromngr boss bitch, but after today's weekly department meeting, I realize that ain't gonna happen.  I'm not surprised.  She is who she is.  You can't change character.  And you have to choose to change behavior, and that's not happening, either.  Why should she?  Obviously Mr. Head Honcho didn't lay down anything close to the law.  I'm disappointed.  But not surprised.  Take it one day at a time, and keep my sights on Friday.

Hey, it's stormin' outside!  (I'm sure Ellen would have a major eyeroll over that statement).

Don't We Need A Cure For Pain?

I’m burning mad.

And it’s from a total sense of helplessness and frustration.

You’ve experienced physical pain. They say that the memory of the pain of childbirth fades over time (supposedly so women will have more babies, instead of saying to their men, “NO FUCKING WAY YOU’RE PUTTING ME THROUGH THAT AGAIN!”) However, I have just the one child, and the Number One Main Reason for that is because I REMEMBER. (For me, that memory didn’t fade).

But the pain of labor/childbirth typically lasts no longer than 24 hours (23…), although I believe that’s pretty uncommon. It’s normally quite a lot less than that, right? It’s intense and terrible, but then it’s over. Whew. We lived. Time for joy (and then the emotional pain…although don’t tell Tom Cruise).

In 1999 I had a herniated disk in my back. I didn’t feel the pain so much in my back as I did down my leg, along the sciatic nerve where the bulge pressed against and then radiated the pain all the way down below the back of my knee and made my foot numb. The intensity of this pain, twenty-four hours per day, seven days per week, was like being in transition labor twenty-four hours per day, seven days per week. There was no position that provided relief. Could not stand, could not sit, could not lie down. COULD NOT FUNCTION. I would have welcomed numbness everywhere, even if it meant I couldn’t walk. How do you convince people, including doctors, that even with the absence of spurting blood, you are in agony? How do you define agony? Do you give it a “pitch”? Well, I’d say high-pitched, rather like a constant scream? And yet you wait a week for the MRI appointment, then you wait another week for the consultation with your neurologist about your MRI film, then you wait another week for the appointment for the test to determine nerve damage, another week because the neurologist is on vacation, another week for another neurologist visit, and then another week for the surgery. And in the process of all that waiting, the nerves are damaging, the brain is atrophying, and the pain is shrieking. We’re beyond the screaming phase.

I can tell you firsthand that Tylenol-With-Codeine ain’t worth shit. Neither is Vicodin. Maybe morphine, but no way will they give you that because you might get addicted. Even the codeine and Vicodin were carefully monitored and skimpy, for the same reasons. All I wanted was relief from the pain, not a high! So those who want the high ruin it for those who need pain relief? Is that what this is all about? Because one night when I was writhing on the floor in the fetal position making animal noises, JDub scooped me up and took me to the emergency room where they gave me a shot of Demerol in the butt. Not right away, though. They had to be convinced that I had an “issue” and that I had surgery scheduled before they gave me that shot. I guess too many people come in off the streets faking pain, looking for a high. What high? I just desperately needed relief! Well, that Demerol came through. For the first 2-3 hours in over two months, I felt pain-free. Is pain-free a high? Well, for me that night, it was, I guess. I was euphoric, that’s for sure. I didn’t feel like an animal sniveling from the raw, constant pain for those 2-3 hours. I could actually SMILE. For two months, my facial muscles had never gone there. For 2-3 hours, life came back to me. And then the pain seeped back in to shrieking pitch.

The surgery took care of the problem. I even remember the instant I woke up from the anesthesia and the very first thing I was conscious of was the absence of pain. Yeah, there was some “discomfort” from the incision, but it was absolutely NOTHING in comparison. Like a pin-prick. Nada. Euphoria.

I describe all of this to lead up to what my mom has been going through – for several years now. Her back problems are a lot more complex than what I experienced, but we are still talking about nerve pain as a result. Nerve pain radiates in different directions, and makes it very difficult to pin-point. As an example, the source of my herniated disk was the left lumbar in my lower back, but the pain was in my butt and thigh. My mom suffers from spinal stenosis. The spinal canal, which contains and protects the spinal cord and nerve roots, narrows and pinches the spinal cord and nerves, for her as a result of arthritis. Take what I went through and multiply it times at least 24, which is the number of vertebrae in our backs, each with a shock-absorbing disk between them. My issue was one of those disks. Her issue is every single one of those vertebrae and disks. She’s had two surgeries, each that “cleaned out” the arthritic build-up to try to open up the space so nothing would rub on those nerves. It really didn’t help. Her second surgery also involved enough metal rods inserted into her back that would for sure set off airport security alarms all over the world at the same time. (I actually saw an X-ray – that looked like something totally alien and other-worldly).

In addition to her kidney failure, which involves dialysis three times a week for four hours each time, here she is dealing with agony. She cannot lie down, and so she sleeps in a “lifter chair” at night in the living room. She can’t cook, she can’t clean -- both of which have always been her pride and joy, and probably how she has identified herself -- with well-deserved pride.  She requires a walker or a wheel chair. Once again, there’s no blood being spurted, but the pain is debilitating. The Oxycodone is worthless. Vicodin is worthless (I already knew that). Absolutely nothing is helping and the pain is getting worse. Why don’t they give her Demerol? Or Morphine? And if she gets addicted, SO WHAT? This is no quality of life. In fact, it’s no life.

I also can’t believe that they can’t do more – surgically, if necessary – to help with this problem. They can replace knees and hips, why can’t they repair something like this? I’m sure it’s challenging, pin-pointing the actual source(s) of the problem, but isn’t that what all this expensive high-tech testing is supposed to do?

And why can’t they come up with pain medication that actually helps with nerve pain? And maybe isn’t addictive? The obscene costs of all these medications that we supposedly are paying to help with R&D, where are the results? FOR PAIN? And the stigma of pain medication, due to abuse – it just fries me that it affects the folks who really, really need it.

Because you know what? I remember what that pain felt like, and I knew for a fact that if it had continued on for a whole lot longer, or if I had been told: “Sorry, nothing we can do”, I’d have been outa here. I wouldn’t put my cat or dog through that.

So Good!

Sometimes I read a book that makes me expel a rush of air when I close the back cover.  It's not a sigh, exactly, but maybe a combination of a sigh and a gasp.  (Of course, a gasp is actually an intake of air.  I'm surprised I don't choke or something). 

I read a lot of books, and most of them I really enjoy.  There are clunkers now and then, and I've learned to avoid certain authors.  But I also like to take chances on authors I haven't heard of before, and I love Amazon for allowing to me to "peek inside".   Getting a feel for what a book is about is the best way to determine whether I'm going to like the book.  Great marketing ploy, too.  (Hmm, that sounds intriguing, I think I'll put that in my shopping cart, let it sit there for a bit, then come back and see if it still sounds intriguing -- then hit that button if it does!)  I'm surprised I hadn't heard of this author.  The book "My Sister's Keeper" sounds familiar, and I'm not sure why I haven't read it.  (It's in my shopping cart now!) 

Not only was this book an excellent and compelling story complete with dimensional and quirky characters, mystery, realistic and fascinating detail about many, many unrelated things (Hopi and Mexican culture; the gruesome grittiness of jail life -- and survival; the potential fragility of literally everything) -- it was also a work of art.   I was in awe of the writing -- the lyrical passages that didn't stoop to pretentiousness.   This is writing at its finest.  Something to aspire to -- or be very humbled by.  Mostly I just really enjoyed it.

This is What I Think About Shampooing Carpeting

God, what a nasty job!   After JDub installed hardwood floors on the main floor, the problem* isn't quite so spread out, but boy is it concentrated.   Yes, this should have been addressed a while ago, but hey.  What would you choose to do between shampooing ca-ca carpeting or heading to Harstine?   

And so I'm resting after that ordeal.  Ack.

JDub and I went to the annual Snowmobile Expo at the Puyallup fairgrounds yesterday, and as usual it was a very popular event.  I was also tickled to see that a lot of the old fairground buildings had either been replaced or remodeled, and they look so much better!  I haven't actually attended the fair itself for several years -- which runs for two weeks in September.   Maybe next year.  Man, I never used to miss going to that thing!  I grew up with it being an unmissable annual event.  Anyway, we browsed through the huge snowmobile swap meet portion of the expo trying to find a replacement seat for my snowmobile (mine has ripped out where I place my knee -- a very common thing).  Unfortunately, we weren't able to find one for the range of model-years that would work with my sled.  The ones we did see were also ripped out.  So, crap.  Duct tape?  We each bought ourselves a new pair of snowmobile gloves that I think are going to be just dandy.  (They'd better be -- they were pricey).  Naturally, mine match my coat (blue and black) and JDub's match his (red and black).   After last year's rather unenjoyable trip to Revelstoke, B.C. (for me --beautiful place, but over-my-head for my skill level), I really haven't been all that excited about snowmobile season coming up.  I enjoyed summer so much, with the Fast Red Boat and the kayaks, that winter approaching just felt depressing.  But after yesterday's Expo, I'm kind of excited about it again.  As long as I'm not placed in the position to terrify myself.  In fact, JDub and Nate are planning on joining up with our friends for another trip to Revelstoke the week between Christmas and New Years, and I said, "Go for it!"  I'll stick around home with the weenies, and maybe go visit my friends in Portland, OR and see their brand new house and celebrate the New Year with them.  (That sounds like a lot of fun).  But I'm open to the local snowmobiling haunts that I know I can manage, as well as a couple of new ones a little further in the Cascades that JDub says I would probably enjoy because they aren't quite so "extreme."  I'm all about that.

And then JDub was agreeable about accompanying me to the annual Holiday Food and Gift festival in Tacoma (it's awesome), and we'd planned on going today.  But then I thought about it and figured my time was better spent being responsible (i.e., shampooing carpets and catching up with laundry).  Plus, it costs so much to get into these things, and then you end up spending big bucks while you're there (just can't help it!) and I ultimately wasn't in the mood for that.  OK, the main reason?  There is nothing I hate worse than strollers running up my ankles.  Crowds of people always mean that very thing.  I was almost at the point of wanting to get out the machete at the Snowmobile Expo yesterday.  (See, I much prefer the peace and quiet of our acre at Harstine where we just don't have to listen to traffic or deal with hordes.  In fact, that's the reason I haven't been all that interested in going to the Puyallup Fair in the past years.  I guess I really am becoming a crone-mudgeon!)

*Weenie dogs hardly house-trained and geriatric cats with bodily-function-Alzheimer's

Five Random Things

This is a meme I purloined from Mainelife.  (I wasn't tagged, but figured it would be OK!)

1) The worst time in my life while I was dealing with the aftermath of my husband unexpectedly leaving me for another woman, coincided with a very positive time in my life having over a dozen poems published by various small press publications. (Misery manifests creativity, that’s for sure).

2) I probably should have gone into journalism, but the aggressive and competitive nature of that business frightened me and turned me off in a big way. I wish it didn’t have to be that way. But I sense that it’s much worse now than back when I was considering it.

3) I have always loved cats. But right now, I have had it “up to here” with cats.

4) It’s a Friday night, and it feels very strange not having my husband here (he’s working 2nd shift – swing shift), and it also feels very strange to not be driving down to Harstine Island.

5) I played the clarinet and the saxophone all through school. I really miss that.  We made some incredibly good sounds together.

Sad

This is me and K, my long-time goofy friend that I've known since the 2nd grade.  This was taken at our 30th class reunion just over a year ago.  K and I can go years without seeing each other, but when we do meet up, we completely carry on where we left off last time, which always involves a lot of giggling and caustic humor.  She is a bright and vibrant goof, as this picture illustrates with us keeping the boobs warm of the statuette.  (And yes, K is a very upstanding, devoted Christian, but she's refreshing proof to me that Christians can have a lot of fun and poke a lot of fun!) 

As of just the other night, she is now a widow.  Her husband of I-don't-know-how-many-years (over 20, I'm sure) died suddenly of a blood clot that developed while he was recovering from minor surgery.  I didn't know him well, but I knew him well enough to genuinely like him and know that he was a very nice guy.  They're the parents of a son and a daughter who are now late teens/young adults. 

Oh, I ache for K and those kids.  Good and vibrant people should not have to experience this kind of tragedy -- he was only 49.  My age.  K's age.  Margaret's age.

I'm not much of a pray-er, but when it comes to asking for strength and comfort for someone who desperately needs it, I look up and ask for it.   And hope He (or She) hears me.